PICKLETINI!!!

Because fuck you, that's why.

Mead is not Beer

The bottle says "Maple Mead 7 - 08" and so it isn't even mead, but that doesn't make it any less like beer than if it was mead. I don't remember if I had anything to do with the making of this beast, but Joe blessed us with a bottle anyway.

I couldn't wait the extra month to make it an even three years, but I probably wouldn't notice a year difference, let alone a month. I remember this at bottling time, and it was thin and didn't show much promise to my untrained palette.

After a nearly three year sulk in a dark cabinet, I'm pleased with the result. It has a gentle and sweet nose, with no hint of maple. I can't remember the last time I drank white wine, but this is sort of similar to what I remember. It's just sweet enough to balance the refreshing bitterness, and it has a nice dry finish. It's a fine apéritif. It's still a bit on the thin side, but it's certainly complex enough, and wonderfully refreshing after a lovely unemployed walk.

What the hell happened to everyone?

South of the Border - North of My Expectations

In keeping with my habit of posting cheap beer when blog activity is low, I offer Trader Joe's new beer, La Playa Lager. Light, cheap ($4/6pk.), and slightly above average ABV for the style of 4.6%. Tastes kinda like Corona, but I think it's much easier to drink, which is either disturbing or awesome, depending on your point of view. Please enjoy it responsibly.

Malta Madness

I saw this stuff in the super market and decided to read the ingredients since "malt" is in the name. It turned out to be carbonated wort with sugar. It even has hops. It tastes exactly like wort, but it's too sweet. I figured I should brew it, but googled it first and people already have, with less-than-amazing results, so I'll skip it.

It did make me want to brew something with weird ingredients though, like crap I have around the house which have nothing to do with regular beer brewing. This, therefore, is not a post about beer.

My name is not Joe.

I'm In Trouble

So Yard House just opened its first east coast location, mere minutes from my home. This could be very dangerous, and delicious. First foray, Stone Smoked Porter. Possibly the best porter I've tasted. And I'm only one beer in.

My name is Joe.

Bear Republic Racer 5 IPA

So it's been a few weeks. I blame my brother, John Six Pack, for having a bachelor party which sadly put me off even the thought of beer for a substantial time afterward. Although at said party I tried the new Sam Adams seasonal and was whelmed. Not overwhelmed, nor underwhelmed, but moderately whelmed. Anyway...

This entry's product is the Racer 5 IPA by Bear Republic Brewery in California. As the label states, it's an IPA, and it certainly wouldn't be described as anything else. It's trying really hard to be one of those hop-head legends like Dogfish Head or Victory produce, but it falls a little short. It's aggressive on the Chinook hops and includes a few other varieties (all beginning with the letter "C" oddly enough).

The aroma is flowery and hoppy, with nary a trace of malt to it, providing no counterbalance to the hops. The color is right for an IPA but I prefer a bit of something besides hop juice, which is what this brew tasted like to me. I enjoy an aggressively hopped brew, and have brewed a few in my past, but honestly, this had little else to offer. This beer has won many awards and was highly recommended to me by the gal working in Whole Foods, but still, I'm unimpressed. If you really like flowery hops and you don't really like the rest of beer, give it a try.

I didn't intend to come off sounding so negative about this beer, because I did drink them all and enjoyed them, though I wouldn't buy it again, I wouldn't turn one down if it were offered to me. The beer, and all of Bear Republic's offerings, are non-vegan, utilizing gelatin in the product.

The movie that best represents this beer is, to me, The Boondock Saints. The film is, I guess, technically a gangster movie, like this is technically an IPA. It hits all the notes it's supposed to, but if you're looking for something representative of the style, and something that makes you want to keep coming back, you'll be disappointed. With that said, there's going to be a certain person who's looking for only one defining characteristic of the style (in the beer, hops; in the film, ridiculous amounts of people being shot), and that person will probably keep coming back satisfied. My name is Joe.

Next up, the Massachusetts entry, Mayflower Brewing Company's Golden Ale.

The States

So I reviewed what I've reviewed and discovered I have not repeated any states yet, so I'm going to go ahead and try to get all 50 states this year.

So far: Pennsylvania, New Hampshire, Missouri, Rhode Island, New York, Delaware, Maine, and coming up next, California. Next beer, by the way, is the Racer 5 IPA from the Bear Republic Brewery, recommended as "the best IPA I've ever head" by the helpful gal in Whole Foods. So that'll be 8 states down, 42 to go, and I might have to re-do Missouri, on account of A-B not really being in the spirit of the quest.

Gritty McDuff's Vacationland Summer Ale

This week's entry hails from Maine, also known as Vacationland. At least, to some. It's a product of Gritty McDuff's, a microbrewery/brewpub with several locations in Maine. I've been to their Freeport location, and was asked by a young man in the parking lot if I was having a "Gritty good time." This young man then invited me to a party with a bunch of college kids I'd never met. It could be one of my great regrets in life that I did not go, but I think I'll manage to be okay.

Anyway, on to the beer. It's a summer ale, so the packie I bought it at must have had it lying around for quite a while, but even so it tasted good. The color is the Maine summer sun, golden and bright. Its head is light and quick to disperse, which is unexpected because of the additional conditioning the brewers give the product, but it's not a type that demands a thick foamy head and one would not go well with the beer. It's a clean, easy-drinking ale, which might even pass for a lager.

The malt flavors are subtly complex, and the touch of wheat malt included in the brew makes a difference adding that complexity. Hop character is not memorable, to my palate, but I enjoy a heavily-hopped brew. It's not absent, but it's nothing special for the hopheads out there. In keeping with the style of Summer Ale, (which if it isn't an official BJCP style, I think it should be) this beer is mild and easy to drink, but with some richness of character. I could certainly envision enjoying a six-pack on a hot midsummer day with a fly rod in my general vicinity so I could excuse the lazy afternoon as fishing.

My research indicates that Gritty's uses isinglass as a finings agent in all their brews, so this one is not for the vegans out there.

This beer, were it a movie, would be Spaceballs. Nobody's going to tell you it's their favorite and no professional critic would readily admit to liking it, but every time it's on, you'll watch it and laugh. Any time this beer were around, I'd have one, and I'd enjoy it. My name is Joe.

Dogfish Head Midas Touch

I've been anticipating this one for a long time. Not quite the 2700 years since the recipe was first concocted, according the the brewers, but a long time. This beer is reverse-engineered from a drinking vessel discovered in the tomb of King Midas, hence the name that Dogfish Head have given it. Whether the legendary king actually turned things to gold or not with his touch, he did well with selecting his brewers.

This is not your traditional beer, and in fact barely tastes like beer at all. I'm most reminded of mead, or a slightly sweet white wine, and the alcohol content, at 9%, tends toward wine country, too. It's quite an image to conjure, the ancient party of Iron Age warriors drinking vast bowls of this heady concoction until they believed that their king could turn things to gold with his touch. And I can definitely see them drinking it in mass quantity.

The brewer recommends drinking it from a white wine glass, which I may have to do with my next four-pack, but didn't try this time around. It does well from a glass, but drinks well from a bottle as well, although I recommend decanting, not because there's a head, which there isn't, but because it opens up the flavors and aromas, allowing you to get the varied experience that is this beer.

Veganosity: Most of Dogfish Head's brews are vegan, but Midas Touch, containing honey, is not. Starting this week, I'm going to alter the scoring system from the slightly boring letter grades I've been using up to now. Instead, I'll grade each by comparing it to a movie. Midas Touch inaugurates this system receiving the grade of Jaws. It's classic, it's tremendous, it's repeatable, and like the film, it broke the rules when it was introduced. Also, I can think of few things that would be more enjoyable sitting on a beach on a cool summer night after a hot summer day.

Speaking of summer, next week's brew will be Gritty McDuff's Vacationland Summer Ale. This is going to get me halfway through a tour of New England via microbrews, and I may have to start tracking the states my brews have come from in an effort to hit all 50 by year's end. For now, my name is Joe.

Ithaca Beer Company Cascazilla

Full disclosure upfront: I might have had this beer before. I can't be sure, though. I once spent an afternoon in the brewery and store of the Ithaca Beer Company and tried a number of their beers, which probably included this one. But I'm going to review it anyway. Ithaca's a beer company which I support wholeheartedly and will buy their products whenever I come across them. Their Nut Brown Ale is heavenly. But on to the CascaZilla!

According to the brewer, the name is both a play on the name of a local gorge (after all, Ithaca is Gorges), and a reference to the "monster amounts of Cascade hops" they use in the brew. Being a hop fiend, I don't know that I'd call the amount of hops in this brew monstrous, but it's healthy, especially given that Cascade is a medium-to-mild variety of hop. I've always been a fan of red ales, and find any excuse to put caramel or crystal malts in my homebrews to get toward that reddish amber color that makes me so very happy. This brew is nearly perfect in attaining that color. Its head is creamy and full, and pouring it opens up aromas that promise a comforting brew to come.

It's a bit strong for sessioning at around 7%, but even so, I could happily sit and consume several of these of an evening with no need to be driving anytime soon. Maybe around a couple of dorky multi-hour board games that I enjoy, or an in-home date night with a dinner and some DVDs. This is a full-bodied and strong brew that is comforting in the cold New England winter (and presumably in the cold Ithaca, New York winter as well), and it's great to find a beer that's wintry comforting and isn't a stout or a porter (although I have no objection to stouts and porters.)

This beer, like all Ithaca beers, is vegan friendly. I am very happy with this beer and will certainly buy it again. I rate it an A-. My name is Joe.

Hurricane Amber Ale

Next up! It's the Newport Storm Hurricane Amber Ale brewed by the Coastal Extreme Brewing Company! You may note by the excessive number of exclamation points that I am excited about this beer! It's true!

Coastal Extreme is a microbrewery in Rhode Island, so being a New Englander myself I couldn't resist giving it a try, although I expected it to be something a little less exciting than it was. Its got a great coppery-amber color, a mild aroma and head, and subtle hops flavor. The malt flavors are where this beer really comes alive. It was totally unexpected, but the flavor came on strong, but not overpowering, and unlike anything you're used to in a beer. There's a complexity of flavor that I can't even identify completely but can only say you should try it and be prepared to be surprised.

The brewer advocates their products as session beers (without using the term), and it's certainly that, I could easily see going through a six-pack over the course of a football game oro an afternoon fishing off the coast of Newport. In fact, if anyone has a yacht to give me, or even a fishing boat, I'll provide a few sixers of these beers. I'm glad to see this brewery is doing well, and even opening a new brewery location in Newport. Hopefully it's an expansion. Also of note, this brewery appears to be affiliated with a still producing Thomas Tew Rums, which I'm going to have to try next time I'm in Rhode Island. I could not determine if this beer is vegan but will contact the brewery and try to find out, and update this post as information becomes available. EDIT: I've heard back from the company, and they inform me that no animal products are used in their brews, so vegans, drink away!

I give this beer an A-, and could even go higher but need room to be surprised by excellence. My name is Joe.

Redbridge Gluten-Free Beer

The next six pack in the lineup was Redbridge Gluten-Free Beer brewed by Anheuser-Busch. (St. Louis, Missouri). It's made from sorghum rather than wheat or barley so as to keep it gluten-free, which of course makes it one of very few beers available to those of you who must remain gluten-free for your own well-being.

At first, I worried on learning that this was an A-B product that it was going to be a gluten-free Bud Light, but on pouring it into a glass, I was pleasantly surprised. The color is a reddish amber and the aroma is beery, if nothing else. The head was a pleasant surprise, and I thought I may have stumbled on a variety of cream ale. The taste is definitely unusual due to the atypical grain content, and I don't think anyone will be mistaking this for a gluten-filled brew, but that doesn't mean it's no good.

It's got a pleasant if slightly overpowering maltiness and negligible hop content, making it fairly easy-drinking. It doesn't sit heavy but doesn't flow like your more popular A-B products, swilling down like slightly tainted water. In other words, it's alright, it's not great, and it rises slightly above mediocrity. For someone whose diet limits them to the Gluten-Free beers, it's a good option for keeping some flavor in your beer, but if your diet has no such restrictions, it wouldn't make it terribly high on the list. Overall, I give it a C+. My name is Joe.

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Speaking of dietary restrictions, I've decided that, in honor of one of my fellow bloggers, going forward I will identify (when I can) in my reviews whether a given beer is vegan. Not everyone may be aware that many beers are non-vegan due to some unseen refining ingredients, so I figure it can't hurt to let you know. On that note, according to my research, all Anheuser-Busch products are free of animal products, except for those which contain honey -- both of which have the word "honey" in the name of the product.

Catching Up

So I haven't been posting weekly, but I have been drinking new beers weekly, and will have you, faithful reader, caught up before kickoff.

Smuttynose Star Island Single

This week's six pack was the Smuttynose Brewing Company's Star Island Single. It's a straw-colored abbey-style ale with a surprisingly refreshing flavor. I'm generally a dark beer kind of guy but this is one I would buy again.

There's not a strong aroma or a thick foamy head, but the faint aroma is tantalizing and promises the flavor not promised by the relatively pale color. The brewers describe it as a session ale brewed with spice, and although I didn't detect much spice flavor, there was a refreshing mix of fruity flavors and pale malts. Hop character was barely present, but was also not called for in this style of ale.

The brewers advertise the ale as "eminently sessionable" and although at 5.3% ABV it's a bit on the high side for sessioning, it doesn't feel that strong when you drink it, and I could readily see going through a six-pack over the course of a football game. It does have the requisite light mouthfeel and clean finish that to me define a session beer, and it doesn't sit heavily in the stomach like some darker ales. It went well with everything I ate with it over the course of the week, from pizza to leftover chili. I didn't pair it with a pasta and wouldn't imagine it being the ideal partner for one. I think its ideal dance partner is probably pizza or nachos, or some other type of salty snack food.

I'm going to give it a B+, and reiterate that it's one I would buy again. My name is Joe.

Next up: Well I'll edit when I decide.

Dead Reckoning Porter

The Troegs Brewing Company's Dead Reckoning Porter Six pack was a pleasant surprise. I'm a man who enjoys a porter, and it's rare to find one that's really true to the style, earthy, smoky, and strong-flavored. It weighs in at about 5.7% ABV.

Served at room temperature, it has a thick and dark whitish brown head, which is much less present when served refrigerated, looking more like your typical porter and less like your typical stout at cool temperatures. Either way, the head has some of the smoky flavor in it, and really opens up the beer.




As soon as you open the bottle, the aroma hits you, and it's a delightful aroma indeed. It blossoms when poured into a glass, smelling like a porter should. It's a fine snack after a long hard day at any sort of work you might do. Its best accompaniment this week was a chili, although it does stand alone and would do well with a burger or something equally hearty.

Overall, it's a solid first entry for this project. I'd give it a B. My name is Joe.


Next up: Smuttynose Brewing Company Star Island Single.

Resolved

So this is a beer review blog, and there's not lots of beer being reviewed these days.

My goal then is to review a beer a week. Every Sunday I'll go buy a six pack of something I've never had before, and drink it over the course of the week, and post a review on the following Sunday. I encourage my fellow bloggers to do the same.

First up: Troegs Brewing Company - Dead Reckoning Porter

This is a seasonal brew which is currently out of season, but was available at my local liquor store, so I grabbed it.

Digging around in the cellar

Last night while brewing up my first tripel I decided it was time to break the seal on the last bottles of Gravitas and Agave Porter Mk. 1

Why both? Because I had forgotten which was which

So, how did these two hold up to somewhere around a year of time in the cellar?

Wow. Full stop.

The porter was glorious and had developed some more complexities. The agave came through in plum notes which played very well with the roundness and depth of the beer.

Somehow I think I either cracked my imperials too early or just didn't appreciate them enough the first time around. The Gravitas certainly didn't mind hanging out in my basement doing its own thing for close to a year. Rich mouth feel, great tan head which exploded in a world of aromatics, extremely smooth.

And here's the reaction from my brewing collaborator last night

The Porter:
What else can i say that describes it better than that I thought it was the imperial stout? complex bouquet, that nice and balanced porter roasty flavor, a surprisingly supple mouthfeel. it was like that last keg of your favorite local brew that everyone forgot about down in the cellar. suddenly it feels like christmas.

The Imperial Stout:
the imperial stout was quite simply an excellent representative of the species. floral to peaty bouqet, luscious mouthfeel, and incredibly developed flavors ranging from overripe stonefruit to french roast beans to mildly earthy grains. fruity, yet meaty. and yes... somehow that is correct...

I still have a blond and an apricot in the basement. I'm not sure when next I'll crack open an old favorite, but if these two were any indication, the next two should be something special.

Red Oval Classic Lager: You can only dig so far before you hit the sewer

I just found another cheap-ass beer at Trader Joe's. At $2.99 per 6-pack ($1 less than the still "great" Simpler Times Lager) I was able to manage my expectations pretty well. I cracked one and smelled it. My girlfriend described it best: "It smells like a 70's block party." It tastes pretty much like it smells. Its only distinguishing characteristic is an unpleasant twinge of sweetness that I've only tasted in Old Speckled Hen or dirty bar taps.

Pros:
1. it's technically beer
2. the logo that screams "I don't give a fuck" from 50 yards
3. it's dirt cheap

Cons:
1. it tastes like dirt

Simpler Times Lager

Anheuser-Bush doesn't need my money, and with the arrival of Simpler Times, they'll never have it again.

This is new from Trader Joe's. I always look for a basic macro style lager that isn't Bud or PBR, and I always hope to be surprised. The last hit was Frugal Joe's Ordinary Beer, also from Trader Joe's, but Simpler Times just took the crown. It's crisper, lighter, but still manages to have a more interesting flavor. It's initially light and clean, but then there's a curious and tasty malty bloom. I'm not claiming that it's a complex beer; that's the whole thing. It's a simple tasty two part ride with every sip. Sometimes I want a robust porter to kick my ass, and sometimes I wanna collapse on the couch in my boxers and enjoy some simpler times.

Interesting aside, the owner of Minhas Brewery is 24. The site could use an editing pass, but I won't complain because I like the beer.

21st amendment brewery ipa

Miildly hoppy as far as a craft brewery's ipa usually goes, but has a
nice caramely flavor paired with it which leaves you palette feeling
nice and balanced between bitter and sweet. Best beer out of a can
I've ever had, I'd even take it over a guiness.